| "The Brain men and women" |
| A Girl was in the hospital, her parents sat waiting in the waiting room...finally the doctor comes out. Both parents jump up, and the whole room watches. "Is it serious?" the mom asked. "She needs a brain transplant" the doctor replies. Both parents stand silent for a moment...then the father asks, "How much is it gonna cost?" The brain? Girl's are 450 dollars, and boy's are 5,800dollars" All the men in the room seem to chuckle to themselves, then finally the fatherbrings himself to ask, "Why are the boys more expensive than the girl's?" THe doctor looks at him and replies, "We have to mark the girl's down because they're used." |
| "Emergency" |
| A couple of New Jersey hunters are out in the woods when one of them falls to the ground. He doesn't seem to be breathing, his eyes are rolled back in his head. The other guy whips out his cell phone and calls the emergency services. He gasps to the operator: "My friend is dead! What can I do?" The operator, in a calm soothing voice says: "Just take it easy. I can help. First, let's make sure he's dead." There is a silence, then a shot is heard. The guy's voice comes back on the line. He says: "OK, now what?" |
"Smelly Couple" | |||
A young couple were on their honeymoon. The husband was sitting in the bathroom on the edge of the bathtub saying to himself, "Now how can I tell my wife that I've got really smelly feet and that my socks absolutely stink? I've managed to keep it from her while we were dating, but she's bound to find out sooner or later that my feet stink. Now how do I tell her?" Meanwhile, the wife was sitting in the bed saying to herself, "Now how do I tell my husband that I've got really bad breath? I've been very lucky to keep it from him while we were courting, but as soon as he's lived with me for a week, he's bound to find out. Now how do I tell him gently?" The husband finally plucks up enough courage to tell his wife and so he walks into the bedroom. He walks over to the bed, climbs over to his wife, puts his arm around her neck, moves his face very close to hers and says, "Darling, I've a confession to make." And she says, "So have I, love." To which he replies, "Don't tell me, you've eaten my socks."
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